Hello my name is Lyndsey and I am 18 months post sepsis shock, this is the first time I am able to sit and write this so I apologise if it is a bit mumbled up.
I gave birth to my son in December 2014 within ten days I was back in hospital dying. I have so many memories but some hallucinations too I cannot work out what's real.
I spent a month in ITU then a further 3 weeks on a ward. It is something that's hazy but I am trying to remember as I type. I remember the ambulance taking me to hospital on Boxing Day and a lot of doctors and nurses bustling around. I remember being in loads of pain and and no one was listening. It took them a few days go figure out it was sepsis and then I was transferred my liver was failing my blood pressure was very low and they said I was dying. So new hospital sats improved slightly and the rest is a mixture of tests hallucinations pain and awful feeling of being away from my new son. Still unsure where the sepsis was to this day.
They kept me on Nora adrenaline to keep me alive. Luckily the sepsis improved and I was put on a ward, then into a room as I caught a bad hospital bug. As I had a new born I was breastfeeding which got left so I ended up with numerous breast abscesses which I had surgery on.
Even now the pain I still experience is so disabling. I couldn't even walk to the toilet or eat what bothers me more than anything I remember the nurses talking about me, they kept saying why was I so immobile?! Honestly I wanted to scream at them!
So fast forward 18 months I have post sepsis syndrome, I am trying to learn to live with the fact I am a completely different person now. I have booked to see a counsellor and saw my gp today. I am hypersensitive and feel pain easily but it's intense my doc has given me meds to hopefully help I just need to see some light at the end of the tunnel. I know I am lucky to be alive but I really do not feel this way.
Thanks for reading x