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JennawithaG

I lost my mum so suddenly

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I am 35, my sister is 37. My Mum was 65 when my sister found her dead on 25th March 2016.

 

She had been unwell with a bug that was going round for about a week, but by the 22nd she was feeling better. On the 24th she called her GP practice, told them she had had a bug but now had severe abdominal pains. As per usual she was triaged by a nurse who told her it was viral and the Doctor wouldn't visit. Between 10pm that night and 6am the next morning she had died.

 

We have just got the full autopsy report and it is so hard to take in. I am a Nurse but I cant see it clearly because it relates to my mum, and I cant cope with those words describing her...

 

It seems to say she died from an Upper Respiratory Tract infection, with generalised sepsis related to ovarian vein thrombosis...

 

She was on her own when she died. Alone in the house with just her dog beside her. My dad died 4 and a half years ago. We feel so alone now.

 

She wasn't ready to go, she was fit and looked after her granddaughter daily. 

 

I feel like the GP practice let her down, but I suppose that's normal.

 

J

 

 

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So sorry to hear your story. My sister died from sepsis very suddenly in January last year. She had just turned 30. She thought she had flu, was only poorly for 10 hours, she then began to be sick, get stomach pains and felt very hot as sweaty. Her fiancé called paramedics who came out and saw her but did not recognise the signs and how sick she was. They left her at home and told her to drink water and rest. She collapsed just after they left and died in hospital 2 hours later.

 

Sepsis is so cruel. My thoughts are with you and your sister. X

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Hello Jenna

 

I am so sorry to read your news.

 

Even being a nurse doesn't stop you from feeling devastated as it was your lovely mum.

 

The more stories you read and hear about, doesn't it just show us the importance of more awareness with as many that can be told. It doesn't mean all sick people would think " do I have sepsis " but just to be reassured why it IS'NT sepsis if symptoms could be there.

 

I have amazing doctors now, but I never used to, so do understand what you mean.

 

That is why this forum and UKST is so vital in helping patients, families and carers to survive, recover or share. While it doesn't change our sadness or pain I do believe sharing does help, we don't feel quite so alone as we genuinely know somebody else on here really understands.

 

Look after yourselves

 

Best wishes

Isabel

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Hi Jenna

 

I am so sorry for your loss. I know exactly how you feel, having lost my mum in very similar circumstances in December 2013.

 

I have lots of unanswered questions running through my head. It is always the first thing I think about when I wake every morning, and whilst trying to get off to sleep at night.

 

Being a nurse doesn't make you immune. Sepsis is a hidden killer and often it's too late. My mum was 62, and with exciting times ahead of her. Life is so cruel isn't it.

 

Not sure which part of the country you live in, but if you fancy a coffee anytime, please get in touch.

 

Sarah

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Yap the word time waster comes to mind.

A doctor in A&E said to me that his colleagues think your a time waster.

 

I know your not but I am more afraded in giving you the right treatment than just sending you away with a few oral antibiotics.

 

I've had menengitis my father died of the exact same condition 10 days later.

I have now got Lyme with cellulitis/sepsis in my legs.

 

The NHS will not give me IV antibiotics.

Its only a reportable condition in Scotland.

Who you report it too?

Public Health. (Mod)

 

I looked under EU law its almost a valid threat.

That we are not going to take it seriously.

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Hi Jenna,

I'm so sorry about your mum. Loosing a parent is very hard even when you're expecting it, but for it to be such a shock and not to have your dad around as well, will have made it so much worse. Even though we're grown ups and can function well on our own, your parents are still your guiding light when life is hard and our support system, no matter what our age. I hope you and your sister can lean on each other to get through this. Being a nurse, we think we should be able to deal with anything but just let yourself be a daughter who's just lost her mum for a while and let yourself grieve. If it would help to talk to a support advisor, do just ask and we'll arrange a call for you. Phone 0800 389 6255. 

 

I'm not an expert on ovarian vein thrombosis but I know it's a relatively uncommon condition which can lead to sepsis.

Abdominal and / or pelvic pain and fever are some of the symptoms (and a possible history of pelvic thrombophlebitis and clotting disorders - which isn't always obvious). If left untreated the inflammation leads to infection and sepsis, which may explain why your mum developed an URTI / chest infection and sepsis.

Take care,

Libby.

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Hi Jenny, I'm sorry I have no words to comfort you or any wisdom to give you understanding. However you and your sister are in my thoughts and prayers.

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